Wednesday, June 27, 2012

Roho ya Kristu

Right after the daily morning Mass at our church we chant this before leaving. I love the poetic cadence of it, both in English and in Swahili. -Earl
Roho ya Kristu, initakase
Mwili wa Kristu, uniokoe
Damu ya Kristu, ininyweshe
Maji ya ubavu wa Kristu, yanioshe
Mateso ya Kristu, yanitie nguvu
Yesu mwema, unisikilize
Ndani ya majeraha yako, unifiche
Nitengwe nawe, usikubali
Na adui mwovu, unikinge
Saa ya kufa kwangu, uniite
Uniamuru nifike kwako
Nikutukuze pamoja na watakatifu wako
Milele na milele. Amina.
Spirit of Christ, cleanse me
Body of Christ, save me
Blood of Christ, give me drink
Water from the side of Christ, wash me
Suffering of Christ, strengthen me
Good Jesus, listen to me
Inside your wounds, hide me
Do not allow me to be separated from you
Protect me from the evil enemy
At the hour of my death, call me
Command me to come to you
Let me exalt you together with your saints
Forever and ever. Amen.

Friday, June 15, 2012

Begging

There are difficulties of various kinds in coming to live and work here. Emotionally, for me one of the hardest things is the occasional begging.

Luckily, Diane and I live in a part of Tanzania that does not see a lot of wazungu, and those who are around are, for the most part, residents like us.

My impression is that places that get a lot of foreign tourists have a lot more begging than our sleepy town. When you are a visitor, it's easier to just give a little money when asked, whether out of compassion or guilt or the desire to get rid of the person. You are merely passing through and you don't have to face the consequences of how you respond, at least not in a direct personal way. Out of sight, out of mind.

For those of us who live in places like this, it's different. The local people are never out of mind. They are our neighbors, students, colleagues, fellow parishioners, shopkeepers, etc. I have least a general concern for their well-being as well as a specific concern for particular individuals. I also have a concern for my own well-being, namely, I don't want to be constantly approached for a hand-out or a "loan", nor do I want to set up such expectations for other wazungu who live here or who are going to.

The upshot is that I grapple with how to respond appropriately in a way that is respectful and caring of everyone involved. Early on, Diane and I took the approach of never giving money to Tanzanians who beg or "ask for help". We did not want to set a precedent, nor did we want to encourage a culture of dependency. We have been very good about sticking to this, which also applies to gifts other than money. In Swahili there is a way to refuse that is polite; that response is almost always enough, with nothing further said.

So why does it feel like an on-going struggle? I began this post by writing that begging is a emotionally difficult thing to deal with. As soon as we arrived in Mtwara an expat who has been here for years told us, "there's no shame in begging". That comment has really stuck with me.

A couple of years ago in the New York Times there was an article about the increased use of food stamps during this recession in the U.S. A single mother was profiled who said that she had to "swallow her pride" to apply for aid. In our individualistic American culture the ideal is that of self-sufficiency: adults work and support themselves and their families. If you're not doing this, what's wrong with you? It feels like a personal failure. So help is asked for reluctantly and then at a very high psychological cost because it is an admission of failing to measure up.

But that's also why it is so hard for us to refuse when asked. The requester has put their self-image on the line — to say no is to dish out yet another blow. Do I like to be so hardhearted?

My conclusion is that among Tanzanians there is an entirely different social and psychological landscape around begging. A complete stranger may approach and ask me to "help him". People we barely know may do likewise. Kids may ask for candy, a ball, or small amounts of money. It all feels rather offhand and casual. It's as though there's not much psychological cost expended, so it's no big deal to ask. And it's no big deal to be refused.

I would not go so far as to say that they have no shame, but rather that shame results from other kinds of circumstances. Being materially lacking so as to need help is not one of them. That's perhaps consistent with African societies being traditionally much more collectively structured and less individualistic. It is just a different kind of survival strategy for a community to have a high degree of mutual dependence and to have a lot of sharing of resources. (By contrast, I'm recalling the line by Robert Frost, "good fences make good neighbors".)

And in Swahili there are proverbs that say that wealth and good things only come from God. They imply that if your situation is good, you can't take much credit for it. Furthermore, if you have been graced by God, then you should share the bounty because it is a gift anyway. There's wisdom in such a perspective.

I do embrace that perspective, but there are other attitudes that also inform my deeply ingrained emotional responses. -Earl

Thursday, June 7, 2012

Community for LMH Missioners While Abroad?

I was recently contacted by someone who is looking into Lay Mission-Helpers and who asked the question "what is the community life like with LMH?" Below was my response, slightly changed. -Earl


Michael,

I think the kind of community you end up with is completely idiosyncratic and the situations vary all over the map. It depends on a lot of different factors.

No one else has been in Tanzania from LMH or MDA, so there has been no possibility of community of that kind for us. On the other hand, that's about to change because LMH is sending a couple to replace us, and around the same time MDA will be sending two couples to a location a few hours drive away. Those six adult missioners will be able to connect with each other and have some built-in community, something we did not have.

Diane and I live in our own home on the grounds of our parish church. The house is physically separated from the other residences of the church and from the homes and businesses in our neighborhood, which means we get very little in the way of casual chance encounters with our neighbors.

Language is a big problem. Tanzania is a Swahili-speaking country. I have made some good progress in learning Swahili, but my listening comprehension sucks. That limits my ability to sustain a conversation and therefore to be able to talk in a meaningful way.

We both like to work a lot. The needs of a secondary school are endless, and there's always something else that could be done. So our day to day life is very much dominated by school. Even on the weekends we often do things work-related at home, especially using our own computers.

Outside of work we don't have much left over for other things and for other people. Certainly for me, dealing with the energy of well over two hundred adolescents is more than enough. 8-D

So where has that left us? Luckily, Diane and I have a close, supportive relationship, and we talk easily with each other. We are constantly debriefing over dinner, sharing our experiences, speculating about what is going on and what the meaning of something is, laughing over funny incidents. For us, it's been a community of two, and that's been enough to sustain us.

And where does that leave you? Well, if you and your wife have a solid relationship, that will be the single biggest asset you bring in terms of community. If you don't, you probably should not consider doing this. It's way too stressful. (No offense intended — I know nothing at all about you two.)

If you're slow with foreign languages like me, then get a jump start on learning the main language of where you're going. I started on Rosetta Stone for Swahili while still in L.A. That helped me to keep up with my classmates when I attended language training in-country soon after arriving. Keep steadily plugging away at it. Every bit of progress helps you to better connect with the local people.

Maybe the most important thing is to know your personality type and what your emotional and psychological needs are. I'm a pretty strong introvert. After a day at school with adolescents acting out and sitting at my desk in a large open room shared with a dozen other teachers, when I come home I crave quiet time with Diane and to be alone. That spills over into the weekends too.

Some factors are in your control, some are not. Your mileage will vary.

Monday, May 28, 2012

Oh, Rats

We bought a Tanzanian rat trap a couple of years ago when we used it to capture and kill a critter that was coming out from inside the walls. We then had all of the openings boarded over and haven't had to use the trap again until just a few days ago.

Diane had suspected another visitor, but it wasn't until she left on her trip that a pretty good sized grey furry animal with a long thin tail just brazenly ran out along the baseboards in plain view while I was sitting here on our computer.

When I was about to go to sleep, I set the trap near a wall, baiting it with a smear of peanut butter (during a summer biology class in high school, we used peanut butter to catch field mice to be dissected; it's the only thing I remember). I also closed the door to our bedroom.

In the morning there it was, caught by the neck. To give you an idea of its size, the length of the trap is about four and a half inches. When I went over to the rectory kitchen to drop off vegetable parings and fruit peels for the pigs, I asked the mama who was cooking what to do with the rat's body. She said to just put it anywhere outside, the birds would eat it. I haven't seen anything like vultures around here but there are a lot of very large black and white crows. I suspect they are quite the scavengers.

Late the next day the body was still there but was already well advanced in decaying. Nature is the ultimate recycler of everything. -Earl

Friday, May 25, 2012

"Humans Have the Cooperative Edge"

From the article "Planet of the Apes? No, Humans Have the Cooperative Edge", published in the New York Times in March:
So researchers are reporting after a study that compared preschool-age children with chimps and capuchin monkeys when solving a puzzle. The children cooperated; the animals did not.
     . . .
The study highlights one of the most important aspects of modern human society: the power of teaching. "Perhaps the most effective means through which you can cooperate is through teaching,” Dr. Laland said. In this way, a basic skill or piece of knowledge spreads through society, “and then one individual will refine it, and then that will be spread through the society, and then that process will be repeated."
After spending the past three years as a schoolteacher at a secondary school, I now have the utmost admiration and respect for those who do this full-time, all the time. This is hard-ass work, emotionally trying and demanding of a lot of people energy. I've done my bit, and I'm ready to go back to building software, which is hardly easy intellectual labor but which is demanding in a very different way.

Still, there are moments when teaching has felt really, really rewarding. We humans are wired for it — as the article asserts, it's an important reason why we are the alpha species on this planet.

So, Mrs Wolf, Mrs Powell, Mr Falkenstein, Mr Andrews, and Mr Dunne, teachers all, I thank you for the difference you made to this shy skinny Chinese American kid who still remembers you with gratitude and tears as he writes this. -Earl

Monday, May 14, 2012

Polykarp Paintings at Majengo Church in Mtwara

This past Sunday Diane and I went to the Catholic church in the Majengo neighborhood of our town. We had known about this place but had never gone there even though it's very close to the main market. So as part of our getting more exercise and seeing a bit more of Mtwara before we leave, we took an early morning walk to the church from our home.

The church is known for its paintings by Fr Polykarp Uehlein, OSB, who came to Tanzania from Germany around 1963.

The paintings are wonderful! Immediately following are a photo of the altar and one of a side painting inspired by Genesis.
And below is a photo of the back of the church. The very wide grey painting which stretches all the way across is the stations of the cross. I took an individual picture of each of the fourteen stations. The depiction is striking. Because of holes and other irregularities in the wall, a few of the paintings are not entirely intact. - Earl








Wednesday, May 2, 2012

Differences Between Tanzanians and Westerners (Part Four of Four)

This posting is a continuation of Parts One (where there are some introductory remarks), Two and Three. As before, the Swahili original appears first, followed by the English translation.

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Matumizi ya fedha. Mzungu huweka wazi matumizi yake ya mwezi na siku kwa mke au mumewe. Mwafrika mume ndio mwenye kitu au ndio mwenye maamuzi ya matumizi yote, na hapaswi kusema wazi mshahara wake kwa mke wake au matumizi yake, na hivyo upelekea wanaume kuwa na nguvu ya kunyanyasa mke wake au hata watoto wake, na hivyo kupelekea kuwa na ubaguzi wa jinsia mpaka leo, mtoto wa kiume huwa na nafsi ya kufanya mengi na kusomeshwa na kuonekana, mtoto wa kiume ni bora sana kuliko mtoto wa kike.

Majukumu juu ya maisha.
Mzungu hugawana na mke au familia majukumu lakini utekelezaji ni kwa wote. Mwafrika sio sawa. Mama wa kiafrika ni kama mtumishi ndani ya familia, atafua, atapika, atachota maji, atatafuta kuni, atatafuta mboga, na baba wa kiafrika yeye ni boss wa nyumba.

Yeye huwa hafui, hapiki, hachoti maji, kibaya zaidi kwa mume wa kiafrika ni kudai haki na atumikiwe. Hii ni hata ndani ya nyumba, mke hana uhuru wa kufanya maamuzi juu ya kuzaa na kupelekea kuwa na watoto wengi. Na kushindwa kuwalea, na wengine huona kuzaa ni fahari kubwa kwao.

Viburudisho. Mzungu upata muda wa kuburudika kama michezo, vinywaji vikali na baridi.

Kwa mwafrika hupata muda huu wa kuburudika katika mambo potovu, kama ngoma ambazo huchochea ngono na vinywaji vya pombe kupita kiwango, na kuwa sio kuburudika ni kufanya vitu tofauti.

Afya ya mwili.
Mzungu uweka mwili wake safi kwa wakati wowote. Mwafrika sehemu kubwa hana muda wa kuweka mwili wake safi na hata kwenye ugonjwa -- uenda kwa waganga wakienyeji, na kuacha kwenda zahanati, and kuamini mizimu na ngoma za mashetani.

Mwafrika uchawi kwake ni kitu muhimu, hirizi ni kinga yake awe mgonjwa au mzima, huamini hirizi kuliko yeyote ya kimaisha.

Kwa ujumla mambo mengi tunatofautiana hata tamaduni, mzungu utamaduni wake ni kusoma vitabu. Mwafrika yeye ni ngoma na kuiga tamaduni ya magharibi muziki na mavazi.

Vyakula. Mzungu hupenda vyakula laini, lakini mwafrika anapenda vyakula kama ugali kwa wanaume wengi hasa Tanzania.

Mwafrika anapenda kula nyama sana. Lakini mzungu chakula chake kwa mpango maalumu.

Hivyo kuna tofauti nyingi nyingi sana.

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Spending of money. The Westerner lays out clearly his monthly and daily expenses for wife or husband. The African husband owns everything and makes the decisions about all expenses, and it is not necessary that he says clearly his salary or his expenses to his wife. In this way you express that a man has the power to harass his wife or even his children, and in this way express sexual bias up to today, that a male child has the personhood to do much and to be educated and to be visible, a male child is much better than a female child.

Responsibilities of life.
The Westerner distributes responsibilities with wife or family but the carrying out is for everyone. The African is not an equal. The African mother is like a servant in the family, she will wash clothes, cook, fetch water, look for firewood, look for vegetables, and the African father is the boss of the house.

He doesn't wash clothes, doesn't cook, doesn't fetch water. It's so bad that the African man demands rights and that he is served. This is so even in the home. The woman does not have the freedom to make decisions about becoming pregnant and to express having so many children. So she fails in raising them, and others see that to give birth is their [women's] greatest pride.

Recreation. The Westerner takes time for relaxing such as sports, beverages strong and cold.

The African takes this time of recreation in misguided things, such as traditional dancing which stimulates sex and alcoholic beverages beyond measure. This is not recreation, it is doing something different.

Bodily health.
The Westerner keep his body healthy at all times. The African much of the time does not keep his body healthy even to the point of illness -- he goes to the resident traditional healer, and stops going to the dispensary, and believes in spirits and the dancing of demons.

For the African his magic is an important thing. Amulets are his protection to be sick or healthy, and he believes in amulets more than anything of life [i.e. of God].

Overall we differ in many things, including culture. For the Westerner his culture is to read books. For the African it is traditional dance and imitating the music and the clothes of Western culture.

Foods. The Westerner likes soft food [e.g. white rice, bread], but the African likes food such as ugali, this is so for many men especially in Tanzania.

The African very much likes to eat meat. But for the Westerner his food is according to a special plan.

In this way there are very many many differences.

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This part completes the translation of Moris' writing. I am a bit stunned by how negative he is with regard to his compatriots. Yet what he writes comes across as truthful and an accurate description of what he sees and how he feels.

If I had the time I would ask him to write about what is positive about Tanzania and its people and about their strengths. But that's not going to happen given our imminent departure.

I am so grateful that Diane and I have had this intelligent, aware, caring and articulate Tanzanian as a helper, friend, cultural informant and fellow parishioner. His presence in our lives has made a huge difference in the quality of our experience here. -Earl